I have no voice
But I love to dance.
I’m a mute.
But I love to dance
I cannot do.
But I love to dance.
I don’t belong
But I love to dance.
The answer is dance,
I must dance.
I’ve tried many things
But I always turn to dance.
Every day I dance.
I think and sense dance.
Dance refreshes my mind
When I feel nulled
I turn to dance!
I was made to dance.
I remember to breathe and then I dance.
My life is a dance.
I’m soothed, I’m real
I am dance.
Random thoughts after an intense 5 weeks of avoiding my passion.
Not because I wanted to, but because circumstances forced me to.
I forced myself to.
And I was given a wake up call.
My innocent mind failed me once more.
But kindness of heart prevailed.
I cannot stop what I love.
I don’t fit in that box they tried to place me in.
Now I know the reality of love and I can return to my artist self.
I cannot escape my artist self.
Now the hardest part is waiting,
But I am relaxed because I know.
So many thoughts are running through a mind. But the truth never hides.
My ideals are challenged, I’m not the mature person I thought I was. I’m in Europe. I ponder on a place where I can be alone, but not lonely. I put myself in that place. But it doesn’t quite work. I seek approval upon every stage of my life. I reject notions of my inadequacy, regroup and fight for another day. I’m in Europe, the mirror that plays with my self concept and my image. How have I grown after being away for a whole year, my friend?
I search back on my art, my past up until now and I see that I did well not to rush too much. I did a lot and I see the products of these but now I am very different. Imagine if I’d rushed, I would see more of these flaws that represent stages of growth. I would laugh at myself then curl up and die. But no, I created just enough to represent myself at a given space of time.
Art is like an anecdote of an expression in a given time. If I do it, I can look back on it perhaps and wonder who it was that did it.. like it wasn’t the person I am now. If I didn’t do it, it is like losing this part of myself that once was. One must if they are an artist, there is no why. And now I juggle this thought as I write, wondering who I am and who I will become, what will I be thinking when I read back on this piece of writing.
I’ve often stated that travel gives me a sense of perspective. But this is only valid for the present time. The future will forget because of its irrelevance and will then make up some other story, and I would have forgotten all that I did. But the feelings will stay strong and I will yearn to have these again. I will want to return again. And my anguish when I can’t, will then become the inspiration for my writing, my art, the way I see the world. It is the part of Europe I take with me, and it becomes a part of me. But this is false, Europe is my friend.
I have written a novel and I continuously go back to it and change it, but it doesn’t work. This is my anecdote in a particular place in time. The time I was in Europe. It’s hard to write about a lifetime, and I did it in the best way I knew how. I wrote it like a dance, reflected in a piece of writing that is much like a poem, that jumps from moment to moment without one realizing, and expresses emotions and not compact events. I think about whether anyone would want to read it, and cringe at the thought. It’s not really for an audience. I don’t think they’d get it or perhaps they’d be bored by it, think it outdated. Who knows. But I want it to be available, just so that this part of me, is preserved because it was so beautiful. I can hear the words in my mind.
My past writing is like a mirror I don’t want to look into at first but when I do, I am pleasantly surprised. I can’t imagine doing it all again. It would be impossible, and it wouldn’t be the same. And how wonderful to look into it and play!
What colour is your ball?
Is it a blue, is it a brown?
Is it yellow? Is it red?
Is it a mix of both?
How it is that you feel?
What feelings do the colours represent to you?
Green could be frightened, blue could be brave!
Yellow could be happy and orange could give you a frown!
All emotions and colours are beautiful.
If you know the password, enter it on the official Poems That Dance page and it will take you to the full version video telling. The password is the last word on the last page of the book.
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There’s a game that goes with this book and I’ll be posting it soon!
I danced like no one was watching
I sang like no one was there
I watched like I was penetrating
I rewrote the words again
but they remained the same
in my head
Shocked I returned to a familiar place
All I expected was gone
Upon visits I didn’t realize
Upon settlement I knew
The predictable rhythm of life
And found you
I want to look beautiful
The day I die
Become lost and find myself
Mix with my fellow people
& dance the traditions
I used to play music often
As I danced to it
I imagined my past belonging to it
The image created love for my soul
I was free
A soul friend
Will always be
She will dance with you
Like no one’s watching
& sing like no one’s there
I watched as she penetrated my soul
I smiled for a glimpse of a moment in time
& ultimately discovered
She was me
Maria Grujicic copyright 2012
This is a poem about finding myself, the real me.
I often have to remind myself that writing is a solitary act. This is what I found the most difficult because sometimes I lack the time, which affects my discipline to write. People around me are doing lots of fun things. They hang out with their friends, go out, and so on. I start to feel that I’m missing out, but I need the solidarity to write my poems. I’ve had to battle with myself about writing because I sometimes think maybe this is selfish, self-centered. But when I force myself to do anything else, it doesn’t work out. I have a hunger to write. I idiotically keep a notebook and pen, in fact lots of pens, in my bag. Out popped all the different kinds of pens from my bag I took from people and forgot to return, just yesterday. You know the scenario.. LOLz I needed that pen.
And so perhaps I was born to write, perhaps not, I don’t want to dwell on that riddle. What I do know is that I love to do it, and no matter what anyone thinks of my work, it will never stop me, because it is who I am. And I discovered that finding myself is the greatest gift I can have, and only I can give this to me.
I created a mask and wondered why human beings love to dress up and play. I made a sad face on one side of the mask and a happy side on the other side, showing opposite feelings. I took care making it and afterwards realized that the sad face was just as beautiful as the happy face. I developed the idea that all emotions are beautiful because it is what makes the person’s character. I felt that having an understanding of why we have certain feelings allow children to have a positive self concept and be more in control of solving problems. This idea makes children feel accepted and accepting of others.
At dance class I noticed the children looking in the mirror and wondered why they were doing this. I wondered what they were thinking. Perhaps the children were playing with their emotions along with acting out the character of their dreams. They wanted to see what that looked like and it was why they were looking in the mirror. There were lots of balls everywhere and I noticed the pattern of movement. They threw the balls away from them and ran to catch them. The spontaneous choreography that occurred was delightful to watch.
At school I used a small tennis ball and passed it around the group. I asked children to choose a colour of their ball and imagine a character. One child said, “Colour my ball, colour my ball and makes a wish! Colour my ball blue. Blue is the colour of a wizard.” The next child wanted to be a princess. At a later lesson I used different coloured play dough. I demonstrated the idea of mixing colours that represented a particular emotion. This was a trial of another concept in the illustrations in the book. The first page is a mix of white and black. The second page is a mix of red and white. The third page mixes red with another colour. Read the book and see the rest of the colours. The colours mix and the friends come together at the end. Another interesting aspect of the choreography was how they played in parallel to each other. The dance instructor gave them ideas and comments, and encouraged certain children to pair up. The children came together at the end to form a circle.
The children made a mask of their favourite character using the mix of colours to represent their feelings. They carefully designed the mask because when the feelings get too mixed up it is hard to see them. Feelings don’t stay the same all the time. They mix and turn, and it was a good way to experience this visually and in a hands on way. All feelings are beautiful, we are beautiful was the main message of the project. For the mask they chose 2 contrasting feelings to draw, and the colours were feelings that complimented them. Feelings weren’t as straight forward as sad and happy. They were “yellow makes me feel safe because it keeps me away from the dark.” Recently this was a comment one of my year 2 students made after reading the class novel, Komiko And The Dragon. It was insightful to her personal response of the characters in the book of which she could relate to.
Lena Truper and I are good friends. We met at tribal fusion dance class and began working with Gala Yakovleva, our dance teacher with the children’s classes. What interested me was that Gala had a philosophy of dance where the participants created the dance. Gala applied the same dances and philosophy with the children’s and adult classes. The characters relate to my personal life of which I wrote a novel that I probably will never publish because of how personal it is. I used the novel as a feeder of my ideas as I recollected events and emotions, and applied them into the present and future.
The wizard is my father. He told me stories and did creative projects with me as a child. Whenever I had a problem, he may not have had a solution but he knew what to say to make me feel better and think about life. The butterfly is the symbol of my mother. From a caterpillar I saw her life grow into a beautiful butterfly and a nurturer of her children. She is more beautiful as she grows. The ageless, timeless quality of a piece is what makes it unique and everyone, regardless of age can relate to the story. The princess is the character I always wanted to be but never thought it possible. The prince is the yellow shadow, and that’s another story. I have a story to share about all the characters in the book!
It was a pleasure to work with Lena. Lena is an excellent listener and observer, and picked up on the connection of the storyline and my personal life. When I saw Lena’s drawings I knew she was the right person to do them because she saw the world in a different way. I wanted Lena to take ownership of the drawings and create them in her own unique style. Lena played with my first sketches that I showed her and developed the ideas. Lena has an innate understanding of book illustration. She connected the pages by an animal that changed. She picked up on details such as the socks. Our friendship grew as we continued to inspire each other and it is why this book has personal value to me.
I created this video to show some aspects of how the book was created. Feel free to post comments and ask any questions. My next goal is to illustrate my own book. I have many other picture book ideas and have been working with video, creating music and dialogue, and photography. I love mixing mediums together and would like to look more into multimodal texts.
ENJOY AND Happy Holidays to Everyone!
Details and character were emphasized.
Showing contrasting emotions.
A paper plate was used to represent the ball.
This doubles up as a tail and a mask.
Details such as a leash were added.
Children experimented with mixing colours and design.
I was excited to find this video while looking for a dance to go with my poem.
LISTEN TO THE POEM WITH WIDE OPEN EYES.
Enjoy the audio along with the video. Play them together.
Try playing the audio at different times or repeating it.
Lately I have been pondering about many issues in my life and those of others around me. I have also been thinking about things that perhaps most people don’t. These are the details that pass us by that perhaps would give more meaning to one’s life, but we ignore. Perhaps this ignorance is simply a way to feel accepted among the crowd. Or an intelligent way of relieving alienation. Whichever the viewpoint, it is a safe haven. It is an issue of personal significance that I’ve explored in my poems. It has been a long time since I wrote and the answer is hidden away in my poems because I cannot truly put it into words.
The only reason for being a professional writer is that you can’t help it.Leo Rosten
She spoke it in a line
Random mind awoke
She drew it with her heart
Eyes followed lines
A mouth pulled them apart
They spread in disarray
She drew it with her heart
Over and under and through
The light we could see.
A mouth pulled it apart.
Random mind awoke
Drew it the way she knew
As she smiled with me
By Maria Grujicic
Artist name, Malena
This is a poem that describes a love for the subject that one draws, of which I feel is required for the art work to be authentic and ‘real’. One needs to simply feel.
I find that as a poet it is important to me that I explore a variety of other art forms even though I am not expert at them. This is because I need to have perspective on the world around me and express these in different ways to bring out the inspiration in me.
I feel that creativity is holistic, like a picture and without other art forms my poems lack that special something. Venturing into something new is like nutrition for my poems. Disarray, it may seem though when it all comes together it forms that picture I have in my mind.
The rhythm to this poem is in my head as I recite it. I hope that this is clear as my audience reads it. I will do up an audio soon.
Comments are welcome. And as always, thank you for visiting.
Sometimes when I think how good my book can be, I can hardly breathe.Truman Capote
Once upon a bright new day,
A sketch revealed
A place that spoke
A hug, A kiss
Was laid with hope
The air she felt
With undying hope
To a place she met
Where hugs were made
And hopes were laid
‘Stop!’ She cried,
When her thoughts arrived
Sods and prods
Though they stayed
In a place
That eventually spoke
Parts were fixed
Where dreams roamed free
She sketched a poem
And yearned for me
I walked away
As her thoughts awaited
For a brand new day.
By Maria Grujicic
Artist name, Malena
I haven’t been writing as many poems as usual because life is getting busy, I tell myself. But this isn’t very true. The truth is that I haven’t traveled since February and I have nothing much that inspires me in my surroundings at the moment. I have been working on a project idea, a picture book for children between 8 and 12. I have also been learning to draw. The poem I have written illustrates my wish for my renewed inspiration to come and perhaps inspiration to write will come through my new hobbies. Here are some of my sketches.
Thanks for reading, and keep on dancing!
Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own. Carol Burnett
I am very happy to let everyone know that soon I will be starting a tribal life forum. This idea was inspired by my close friend and teacher, Gala Yakloveva. She was inspired to come up with an idea to create a book about tribal dance because of my post Tribal Hair And Make Up. The idea is to turn the forum themes and discussions into a book.
I would like to invite my readers to click on the link, once I start the forum, which will take you to the forum. There you will find categories of topics or you can create your own. This is very exciting for me because I will continue to connect with my dance friends, strengthening our bond, of which distance will not break, and hopefully make some new friends as well from different parts of the world!
Thank you for reading, and I look forward to your thoughts,
Maria Grujicic ~Malena~