To Keep Or Not To Keep The Last Phrase In This Poem?

A Backdrop For A Theatrical Play

A name is like the appearance of a face in a dark shadow.
Isn’t that the face of wisdom?
Dream walking along the path
Alone physically and unaccompanied mentally.

My writing comes from my heart
I illustrate my feelings like a work of art
They are the reflections of my dreams
And they are true
Because they live in my head
The written text
It is the stuff we don’t normally say
I woke up to a new poem and a new day
I tried to look back
To make out the meaning
But it was too dark
And there was nothing I could do
But play

By Maria Grujicic,
Artist name, Malena

I’m spending some time looking over my poems for my next poetry book, and I thought about adding the last phrase ‘But play’… My instinct tells me to leave it, but another part of me feels it is not doing justice to the intelligence of the audience…and the more I read it the more I agree… What do you think?

Please note>  All poems are copyright.

And as always, thank you for reading!


About Malena

Hi! I love to create.. poetry, stories, pictures, songs, music... games and more. Oh, ... And Did I mention I love to dance? ...

Posted on May 6, 2012, in emotions, Poem for adults, Writing and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

  1. Hi,
    Thank you for listing my post on your blog.

    • You’re very welcome and thanks for stopping by! If you have Facebook or/and Twitter we can follow each other more regularly. Life can get so busy…this is a great way to stay in touch.

  2. I think you should leave it in. It seems to add “completeness” to the thought.

  3. Hi David! Yes, and it links well with the title to end. I wrote this ages ago and just read it again last night to pick that up… I had a slight writer’s block and reading back on my poems really helped. I wrote a poem last night and redrafted it this morning, … it’s quite personal…. I guess it was the one I was waiting for, or was IT waiting for me? Nice to hear from you and take care. Thank you.

  4. Dear Malena,
    So sorry I am so late in answering..but I wasn’t feelin’ well.Today I am happy for reading Your poem as usual.What does that means to play?To dance?What ever it meant I think the ending is perfect with this”play” stuff.Word means so much.Life is one big play or dance what it take.Then it is one big fun.
    I love Your poem as always.Really great!
    Have a great and amazing day my friend.
    With love and respect,milena

    • Hi! I’m sorry to hear that you aren’t feeling well and I hope you feel better. Can you please let me know how to address you? I appreciate so much your words. Yes, I agree. I am trying to express life like a game, a theatrical play. And the place we find ourselves is the backdrop. It is a saying that my father often said to me as a child… that this life is pretend, like a game, and I suppose I internalized this…and funnily didn’t realize until perhaps now.

      Take good care of yourself.

  5. That is one of the reason why I love Your poems,I can feel them in my own heart.That means You are very good poet if You can do that with Your words.Yes,I felt what You meant by this amazing poem.It is beautiful.Well many times after many years we recognise why is inside our words.You are very lucky to have such wise father.He is so right about life.It takes sometimes whole lifetime to understand this.
    You can address me by my name,milena.I am suppose to be fun of Your poems for long time.It is my pleasure always to read them.Have a beautiful rest of the day.
    You take care my friend and be blessed!

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